question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize