Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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