Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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