I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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