Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize