Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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