One girl and one boy is just not enough.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
