just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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