East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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