I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
