I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You ruined the universe
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize