remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize