Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You've changed since you got that strap on
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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