Small penises have feelings too.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
