He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Randomize
