She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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