do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
