Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Randomize