Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
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