Having a random hookup so left but love u
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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