we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
