ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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