you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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