they need to just BURY HIM!
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He did a backflip because drugs
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
