she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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