i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
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