After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
