she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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