he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
