I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Farmville is her only friend.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
