I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize