Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Randomize
