Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(921): View more from

found out what b.m.t stands for.

(1-921): View more from

what did you think?

(921): View more from

bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around

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(972): View more from Texas

it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles

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(740): View more from Ohio

ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose

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(626): View more from California

The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.

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(660): View more from Missouri

I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket

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(816): View more from Missouri

Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.

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