i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
