Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
