Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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