420 ftw
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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