We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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