It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
i think i just lost a toe
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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