If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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