similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
