I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Please don't give away my fajitas
This toilet bowl is my home.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
