Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
