I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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