I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I wish I could teleport
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Randomize
