Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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