I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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