Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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