You just made me feel so damn special
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
