I just made out with a guy for $7.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
